surreal life

i'm in bed in a hotel in chicago. the tv is showing a commercial on how to make your lawn rich, green and beautiful. i have no lawn, and little interest in the advertisement. last night my friends threw me a wonderful going away party. nearly everybody i could have wanted there was there. it's good i got to see them. who knows when it will happen again. there was beer and margaritas and hot dogs and pot and many loved ones. nicole told me she was going to the store, asked me if i wanted anything. i told her i wanted sunchips. sunchips are wonderful and crunchy. i will miss them. the party was more than i ever could have asked for. nicole and chad are awesome and have let me store everything i own in their basement. i gave them a bottle of jameson, some drugs and a hug. it was the least i could do. the night was great and ended emotionally. humans are the only creature i know of that cry. when it was time to leave, the mood was harrowing and i tried to hide my sadness by acting flippant. a defense mechanisim for sure. but it failed miserabaly and when we were lingering at the doorway, prolonging our goodbye, the tears were building. they all came out when jenna hugged me. it was long and meaningful and exactly what needed to happen.

now the tv is back to the program on gang life in prison. they kill each other for respect. the narrator says you have to be in a gang to survive in prison. that makes sense.

i have this hotel room to myself. that is good because i can use the other bed like a table. tables are useful. obviously. i've met so many people today. this morning i was checking in at the kansas city airport and the girl next to me had an arkansas driver's license. she just graduated UofA with a degree in internatioal relations and is going to the small island of shikoku in japan and does not know any japanese. she was also born in houston, like me. her name was courtney and she used to work for the wal-mart corporate office. we made quick and easy conversation and hung out all morning. then she went away.

that's been the case all day. there are 200 people in this hotel going to japan. something as simple as a last name or flight number can separate a small group. and you never see these people again. then you meet new people. and then you get separated again. so it goes.

i felt really bad later on when, after the reception, i told a fellow KC area traveler i'd meet him in the lobby and we'd go out for some drinks. but when i stopped by my room to change clothes and make a call or two, the magnetic key didn't work. i had to get it fixed and there was a line and i didn't want to wait so i went outside for a smoke and met up with ryan and lance and nick who i met earlier and we smoked and went nextdoor to the bar for a drink and were gone for a couple hours. when i got back the line was gone and i got my card fixed and got into the room and made some calls. then lance and his roommate josh came down and we went back out and drank stella artrois and irish carbombs and watched baseball. now it is late and i'm wide-eyed and have no inclination to sleep. it will probably be this way for days.

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last day in america

I leave for Japan soon. Moving is never fun or easy. I was packing things away yesterday and I found an old notebook. I must have been writing in it around winter of 2005 because there are lots of travel notes. Also random notes from interviews, assorted lists, the occasional good idea or two and this, which I find rather meaningful at the moment:

muscles stretch
paper rustles
water drips
drops splash
splashes wave
waves echo
echoes bounce
bounces leave
leaves fall
fall changes
changes happen.

Indeed they do. Can't fight it. Gotta love it.